This electronic diary is continued on Tony Perez's Electronic Diary (May 15, 2018 - ), on tonyperezphilippinescyberspacebook40.blogspot.com. Kindly proceed there for the continuation of this cyberspace book.

Tony Perez's Art of War: When someone does not want to help you, he will tell you, "It doesn't work that way."

Remember that line. Use it on him when it is his turn to ask you for help.

Worked an hour on fifth layer on one painting.

Lunch at home with Angelique. Aubrey at university.

My love affair with red

The sun is the pot of gold, that is why you never find it at the end of the rainbow.

He was eliminated because his first line was always soft, low, and inaudible.

Being an artist is always suspenseful because an artist cannot see what his works will be 50 years from now.

One step toward making your dream reality is to write them down in your private journal.

Have a throw carpet. It represents astral travel.

Overconfidence is worse than lack of confidence.

Sometimes you have to allow the mind to do the walking.

You can never be truly upset with someone whom you understand completely.

Worked an hour on fourth layer on one painting.

Might have to call it a day for painting. This layer needs to dry completely.

Worked an hour on third layer on one painting.

Worked an hour on second layer on one painting.

Angelique now off to vote and then study in a coffee shop.

Fredo, who used to work at Miranda's Cove (circa 2002), his wife, two kids, and brother Nino arrived from their hometown to bring Nino to work at Lelyn's store. They'd had lunch, so I gave them dessert, brought them to Lelyn's store, and afterward to Lelyn's mother's store. Quite a production number; the little boy's diaper had to be changed in my bathroom.

The house is no longer what it was in 2002, and I had difficulty envisioning how Fredo remembered it to be.

Lunch at home with Angelique. Aubrey at university to finalize a group project with her classmates.

"Survival of the fittest" is a phrase applicable only to people without talent, because everyone who has talent survives no matter what.

Actually, every true artist should be capable of being a B-I-T-C-H whenever he needs to be.

Humility allows you to accept things as they are, and therefore let things be. One cannot be humble if one wants to introduce changes and challenges to one's self and to the world.

Humility is demanded by a commander, of his soldiers. By a corporate head, of his subordinates. By a religious leader, of his followers.

Yet, a true artist cannot be humble on others' orders. He is an individualist, and does not conform even to his individualist peers.

No cultural and artistic revolutions are ever the result of humility.

A great artist will show more than his works whether he likes it or not. He will inevitably and unconsciously also show his complex personality.

Some days I miss wearing my rings, other days my bracelets. Can't wear them when I'm painting.

Been wearing only earrings some days and necklaces other days.

Good morning, Cubao!

The sun is a girdle of golden coins.

The werewolf crossed the street to the burger stand.

Watching yet another episode of Genius: Picasso on National Geographic.

Dinner at M.'s cafe with Aubrey. Aubrey had barbecue-flavored buffalo wings and rice, I tried the tapsilog again. We took home a serving of hot and spicy buffalo wings and steamed rice for Angelique.

Worked an hour on first layer on one painting.

Painting is a result of a vampire's bite.

Writing is a result of a werewolf's bite.

Both conditions are irreversible.

Worked an hour on construction lines on one canvas.

Finished construction lines. The canvas is now ready to receive first layer of paint.

Washed two brushes and a mortar and pestle used for glazing.

Now in bed watching another episode of Genius: Picasso on National Geographic.

Worked an hour on construction lines on one canvas.

Getting there.

Worked an hour on forty-ninth glaze on one painting.

This painting is finished.

Good morning, Cubao!

The sun is wearing a yellow track suit.

Angelique, Aubrey, J., and R. are back from their dinner out.

Everybody home.

Worked on forty-eighth glaze on one painting, continued construction lines on the other.

Bustling house, home admin duties, a ten-painting exhibit, syllabi for two playwriting workshops, among other things--these would not have been possible had I not retired from work.

Home alone, dinner alone. Thought of going to M.'s cafe but decided to have leftovers instead.

Commenced construction lines on my ninth painting.

Washed 17 brushes and five palette knives and scraped two wooden palettes clean.

Family left for the airport in two vehicles to see CatCat and Ashraf off to Lebanon.

The werewolf crossed the street to buy a sugar-free mango shake.

Finished underpainting on one canvas. Will commence construction lines as soon as it is completely dry.

Only if you paint for hours and hours a day will you discover your real, artistic breakthroughs.

Going to bed tonight not with a Judge Dee book but with Arianna Huffington's 1988 Picasso: Creator and Destroyer, though somewhat dreading it. I recall that, when I read it for the first time, I found it very sad and very depressing. After this reread I shall decide whether to give it away or not.

Aside from my week-long playwriting workshop "From Dreams To Drama" (incorporating exercises in dreamwork and dream analysis) for TheatreWorks Singapore, I am conducting one, half-day workshop for prospective participants of the 24-Hour Playwriting Competition.

The half-day workshop will be held at historic Haw Par Village. (I can't upload load the photos but I love those pieces of sculpture depicting the Taoist hells; they seem to be all over the place!)

I would invite my Filipino friends who are interested in playwriting to sign up for "From Dreams to Drama", but the registration fee is quite pricey--I think, but I am not sure, between $600 - $900, and they have to pay for their own return air tickets, accommodations, and food, on top of that.

Aubrey and R. off to the mall.

CatCat and Ashraf arrived from Divisoria.

Worked on forty-seventh glaze on one painting.

The other canvas is ready for underpainting.

Lunch at home with Aubrey. She is now going to a mall to meet R. and buy a pair of shoes and a thermos. Angelique at college, but J. and she will have lunch at home in two hours. CatCat and Ashraf back in Divisoria doing more shopping. All of them going to the airport this afternoon, after which Angelique, Aubrey, J., and R. are having dinner out.

As for myself, staying home painting. One of the paintings will be finished very soon.

Good morning, Cubao!

The sun is a sack of golden mangoes.

Calling it a day for painting, but I feel that I accomplished much today.

Worked an hour on forty-sixth glaze on one painting.

Keeping Angelique company; she is studying in the dining room.

Dinner at home with Angelique, Aubrey, CatCat, J., R., and Ashraf.

Seven at table.

I now feel like the old man in "The Japanese Lantern".

Worked an hour on forty-fifth glaze on one painting.

CatCat and Ashraf arrived mid-afternoon. They are staying here tonight to catch their flight back to Lebanon tomorrow.

CatCat now cooking halal food in the kitchen while Ashraf is playing Egyptian music. I like.

Antihistamine will make you feel tired at night. But, it will continue to make you feel tired the following day.

Not all Economics majors are economists.

Know that, by the same token, not all Fine Arts graduates are artists and not all Creative Writing graduates are writers.

Worked an hour on forty-fourth glaze on one painting.

Due to a changing of the guard amongst spirit guides, twentieth-century strategies no longer work in the twenty-first century.

A warm rainfall on Cubao.

You either listen patiently to the music and try to appreciate it as best you can--or stop it altogether and play something else.

Worked an hour on forty-third glaze on one painting; also primed one canvas.

Aubrey off to the family dentist's and later study with R. at a coffee shop.

A sweltering afternoon.

It seems that neck scarves bring bad luck.

We dream not only at night when we are asleep but also in the daytime when we are awake.

Fate, ironically, will always force you to see the good in everyone, even if it be against your will.

"Gentlemen, it's time for one of you to leave the forge."

--Forged in Fire

The incapacity to have purchasing power is always the springboard for envy.

Do not immediately dispose of your sketchbooks. They are records of your habitual mistakes--mistakes you should train yourself to correct and avoid.

Art never works well with deadlines. Take your time. Do not let others set deadlines for you, and do not set deadlines for yourself.

A mage will never chase or woo anyone to be his apprentice. It is always the other way around.

Lunch alone; I need to start painting again.

Angelique and Aubrey waiting for J. to arrive; they are having lunch together.

CatCat and Ashraf due 2:30 PM.

Good morning, Cubao!

The sky is the surface of a blue, porcelain vase.

Your Messenger message:

"sir tony magandang gabi. ano pong ibigsabihin po ng dalawang guinea pigs sa panaginip kp. nagulat po ako at nagising ako na nasa kama ko yung isa walang balahibo sa may leeg. yung isa naman po sobrang laki (taba). ang pakiramdam ko po sa panaginip ko ay nag panic ako dahil nakawala po sa cage. not sure po kung natakot ako. salamat po"


My reply:

Hello ______!

Both guinea pigs signify that, at this point in your life, you are looking at the wrong choices and the wrong options.

It is possible that you are making career decisions via trial and error and are committing more errors. Always think ten steps in advance, plan everything, and have good, interpersonal relationships with your co-workers--at least, until after you retire, when you then may be as vicious as you like toward them.

Read the last two chapters of The Cat Who Said Cheese. Wondering if I'll pick up a Judge Dee book next.

D.L. and J.A. want me to do their portraits. Will have to schedule these after my exhibit.

I hope that no one else asks me to be somewhere else tomorrow. I've already lost two full, painting days. There is nothing left for me to do now but rest and watch TV. 

Dinner at home with Angelique and J., then Aubrey woke up from her nap and had dinner too.

Ordered a dish from the cafe. The new, young waitress (who had never been inside the house till then) served it through the secret passage and was blown away by my paintings. She stayed and watched me paint for a while.

Worked an hour on forty-second glaze on one painting.

The werewolf crossed the street to buy a sugar-free avocado shake.

Mars interview on ghosts/spirits with Suzi Abrera and Camille Pratts

Worked an hour on forty-first glaze on one painting.

Must stop for now. Going to a TV interview later and don't want to look spaced out.

Good morning, Cubao!

The clouds are unopened love letters.

Calling it a day for painting. Now in bed watching TV.

Worked an hour on fortieth glaze on one painting.

Painted till midnight tonight. The living room is now--albeit temporarily--filled with seven, finished oil paintings propped up on chairs, there is one unfinished painting on one easel and a canvas awaiting underpainting on a second easel, and after that one more canvas in storage needs to be worked on for a total of ten paintings.

Working like the Vampire Marius, but loving it.

Everybody home.

Angelique, Aubrey, and Cath are now upstairs.

Dinner at home alone. Angelique having dinner out with Cath, after which Cath stays here overnight. Aubrey having dinner out with friends; they have no classes tomorrow.

Worked an hour on thirty-ninth glaze on one painting.

Worked an hour on thirty-eighth glaze on one painting.

Worked an hour on second glaze on one painting.

This painting is finished. Setting it aside to dry and will place another canvas on its easel to commence another painting.

Second delivery of the day

Coffee from the Middle East from Christine Bellen

Prepared Angelique's lunch, then had lunch at the center with a friend.

Back home in time for a delivery to arrive. Perfect timing.

Good morning, Cubao!

The sun is an entourage dressed in gold.

Been watching the series Genius: Picasso on National Geographic. Fabulous cast, fabulous sets and props, great cinematography, screenplay, and direction. Although not set against a massive revolution, it is, to me, as epic as David Lean's Dr. Zhivago.

A person who likes having his way all of the time is better off living alone.

If too many other people are now doing what you are doing, it is time to move on to something unique.

He who does not compete is seldom disappointed.

There are three, standard, necklace lengths, which is why you can wear all three at the same time.

You cannot sing yourself to sleep. Someone else has to sing to you.

Both suffering and pleasure are temporary.

One side of a coin cannot see the other, but the sides of other coins can.

Wish for rain, but do not generate a storm within you.

No one can suppress or replace a truly brilliant artist.

Insects kept as pets will always be unhappy and will languish. Moreover, remember that elementals frown upon human beings keeping insects as pets.

An envious person seldom changes, because his/her predisposition to envy is deeply rooted in his/her childhood deprivations.

Sometimes you cannot help listening to broadcasters not to find out how knowledgeable they are but to find out how ignorant they are.

Dinner with Angelique, Aubrey, and J. at M.'s cafe.

Worked an hour on thirty-seventh glaze on one painting and first glaze on the other.

Your Messenger message:

"Hi, Sir Tony! I need your advice. I was attracted to this painting and took it but when I brought it to my apartment my landlady was adamant about having paintings at home for fear of the energy it might bring. You think I should keep this or put it away? Looking forward to hear from you. Thank you very much."


My reply:

Hello _____!

The painting is quite pretty. Your landlady is quirky--this is the first time I heard about paintings being prevented from installation in a rented house.

But, she is the landlady after all. Just wrap the painting and wait until you can move into your own property. Save up for it and do it. There is no other freedom like living in a place you own.

Worked an hour on thirty-sixth glaze on one painting.

Waiting for the third glaze on the other painting to dry completely.

Scraped one wooden palette clean.

Worked an hour on thirty-fifth glaze on one painting and third layer on the other.

The painting with three layers has now suddenly come alive.

Lunch at home with Angelique.

Note that, when people do not deserve whatever they take or get or make themselves out to be, they are required to lose or give up twice what they have.

Fewer people voted because she could not transcend behaving like a hyperactive retard.

In your dream, we walked. You told me that your greatest fear was death. You wondered how your cadaver would look like in your coffin and whether it should smile a little so that others wouldn't feel so sad gazing on it.

Good morning, Cubao!

The clouds are installed with hundreds of video cameras.

Read two more chapters from The Cat Who Said Cheese.

Sat with Angelique while she had dinner.

Everybody home.

Gave food to the security guard.

Worked an hour on thirty-fourth glaze on one painting.

Worked an hour on thirty-third glaze on one painting.

Dinner at home with Aubrey.

R. arrived. Aubrey and he are working on their presentation defense tonight.

The werewolf crossed the street to buy a sugar-free guyabano shake.

Worked an hour on thirty-second glaze on one painting.

Worked an hour on thirty-first glaze on one painting and second layer on the other.

Your Messenger message:

"Sir Tony pede po ba...mgpa interpret po ng dreams ko...? Sir I had a dream na asa kitchen ako then nkita ko ung pinto sa itaas na bahagi ng lababo inayat ko ito sa panaginip ko, ng sinilip ko ung ng pinto ko ng likod ng kitchen nung una dko mamukhaan kung cno yung anino n nakatingin sken ng titigan ko cxa mabuti nkita ko ung lola ng classmate mo (kmaganak nmin cxa, when I was young u always ask her hand pra magbless) nakatingin cxa sken n sa kabilang bakuran, nkangiti lumabas ako ng pinto at cnb ko "lola mgbbless po ako"sa halip n iabot nya kmay nya sa my bakod lumapit cxa, tumawid cxa pra makapgmano ako. Bago cxa nkalapit my aso sa harapan nya nkatali ngworry ako n bka mkagat cxa pero dinaanan nya lng yung aso at umupo cxa s harapan ko at ngmano ako. Tas sb ko daw s kanya my kukunin lang ako saglit s loob ng bhay ,nakangiti cxa sken at inaantay nya ibbgay ko. Tas ng baba nko s baba s pinto kitchen n mataas nkita ko yung tubo umaagos n color brown dko alam kung ano un. Dun po nputol pnaginip ko. I also wondering s panaginip ko umayat ako sa may lababo pra mkarating s pinto ng likod bhay nmin which is hindi normal style ng bhay na sa halip n cabinet s my taas ng lababo pinto ang asa pnaginip ko. Plus that lola is mtanda n nung bata pko at patay n cxa."


My reply:

Please send me this in straight Tagalog.

Your e-mail message:

"Dear Sir Tony,

"Good Morning. Sharing with you my dream yesterday.

"In my dream, i was with my mom and sister in our house (although the house doesn't resemble our current home). it was a bit dark, parang blackout. then kailangan ko magcharge ng phone. may available sa malapit na poste ng bahay pero nung sinaksak ko parang nag short circuit. so i went to an open dark room where the phone of my mom is charging. tinanggal nya with ease yung phone nya para ako naman makapagcharge. nung ako na yung magcharge may nakaharang na aparador tapos parang bigla lumayo yung socket. di ko maabot para magcharge. for some reason di ko sinubukan na iipod yung aparador. then binuksan ng nanay ko ilaw ng kwarto. inipod ko yung aparador. pero bigla ako natakot pumasok sa room. kaya lumapit ako sa nanay ko para magpasama sa loob ng kwarto. 

"Ragards,

"_________________"

My reply:

Hello _______________!

It is possible that you are fantasizing about entering an illicit relationship with a woman. Your family values (mother and sister) are preventing you from doing so. So is your psyche, since you are unable to insert the plug into the socket.

In this dream, light represents realization and insight. Your house does not resemble your current home because it implies a major change that you are not ready for. 

Does the armoire have a mirror? If it does, it behooves you to look upon your own reflection in it. 

Your Messenger message:

"Good afternoon po. Thanks again for... I would also like to ask for your help with my family. They had a blow out yesterday and it's because of my younger brother. I really think he has mental issues but I don't know how to make him to seek treatment other than asking him. He is verbally and emotionally abusive to my parents and his wife and kids. He is now separated but sees his children regularly. I have messaged him and tried consoling my parents. I don't know what else to do after that other than pray for them and ask my spirit guides to assist us. For episodes like this, is action always required or should we just watch, let it unfold and accept that this is necessary like payment for karmic debt for the people involved?"


My reply:

Hello _____!

Do your best. You are also a karmic player. Guide him and allow him to mature. It's like taking care of a delicate plant.

Yes, we are not only stewards of the earth. We are also our brothers' keepers.

He was eliminated because, to the average voter, he looked more and more and more like a grotesque matron. 

Lunch at home with Angelique.

Good morning, Cubao!

The sky is festooned with white gelatin.

Phat Q'aat

Tony Perez's Art of War: Everyone has a mean streak. Show yours once in a while, especially if you can be deliciously mean, so that others know whom they are up against.

Tony Perez's Art of War: When you conduct a workshop on any topic, make sure that no one else can conduct it effectively but you.

Dinner at M.'s cafe with Angelique and Aubrey. Angelique tried the sizzling pork, I tried the sizzling tuna, and Aubrey had the barbecued buffalo wings as usual.

I also tried the nutella shake, which was good.

I'm so full I can't do any more painting tonight. Will just snuggle up in bed with The Cat Who Said Cheese.

Worked an hour on thirtieth glaze on one painting and first layer on the other.

Three-hour, deep tissue massage.

CatCat and Ashraf arrived from Divisoria, then left for Cavite once again. They are coming back to stay overnight before the day of their flight back to Lebanon.

Worked an hour on twenty-ninth glaze on one painting; finished construction lines on the other.

Lunch at the center with Angelique and Aubrey. Then Aubrey did some minor groceries, after which I dropped the two at a coffee shop where they will be studying through the afternoon.

Back home, CatCat and Ashraf arrived from Masantol, where CatCat introduced Ashraf to her relatives. They left after a few minutes to go to Divisoria.

Treachery is always offered in exchange for money.

Worked an hour on twenty-eighth glaze on my painting.

Set up an eighth canvas and finished its underpainting. Hoping to commence construction lines this evening, after the underpainting dries.

Two cups very black, Kalinga coffee that my son Chito bought in Baguio for me.

Good morning, Cubao!

The sky is a blank spread in a writer's journal.

Thought of going to M.'s cafe for a drink and barbecued buffalo wings, but decided to have lambanog night in my captain's cabin bedroom. Two shot glasses of liquid, flawless diamonds.

Wishing P. were here with me. I like drinking with people I really like.

Going to bed with the satisfied feeling of now having six new paintings for the prospective exhibit for the 50th Year of the 4-F Elans. I pledged eight to my co-alumni, but I think I can produce ten.

If this event doesn't happen (after all, it was already cancelled once), I can always exhibit the paintings on my own for a period of three to five days (I refuse to handle the stress of anything more than that). 

Dinner at home with Angelique, Aubrey, and J.

CatCat and Ashraf might drop by tomorrow. They're planning to go to Divisoria.

Worked an hour on twenty-seventh glaze on one painting and fourteenth glaze on the other.

The painting with fourteen glazes is finished. If I have time later tonight, I will set it aside and set up another canvas in its place.

Worked an hour on twenty-sixth glaze on one painting and thirteenth glaze on the other.

Consumed a third half-bottle of Paning's butong pakwan while watching TV. It's just me, I guess, but afterward I always feel like I've eaten a wedge of camembert.

The only person who can tell you "Well done!" is yourself.

Worked an hour on twenty-fifth glaze on one painting and twelfth glaze on the other.

Worked an hour on twenty-fourth glaze on one painting and eleventh glaze on the other.

Lunch at home with Angelique and Aubrey.

Overcast skies above Cubao.

Good morning, Cubao!

The sun is a polished, brass, belt buckle.

Calling it a day for painting.

It felt like a long day for me, for some reason.

Worked an hour on twenty-third glaze on one painting and tenth glaze on the other.

Dinner at home with Angelique and J.

Worked an hour on twenty-second glaze on one painting and ninth glaze on the other.

Washed twenty-eight brushes.

Worked an hour on twenty-first glaze on one painting.

The day pulled me a fast one. It's 3:13 PM already.

Lunch with Angelique and J. Aubrey and R. are still working on their school project.

Worked an hour on twentieth glaze on one painting.

When a student rejects you once and then comes back to you, do not take him in again.

Never wish other people "More power to you!" indiscriminately, because the majority of people psychologically short-circuit with "more power".

Good morning, Cubao!

The sky is a whiteboard on which little children write their wishes.

Aubrey made chocolate-covered strawberries tonight.

As for myself, I watched TV in bed and consumed half a bottle of something I bought earlier. Yes, I committed a grievous sin today. I swung by Farmers Market and purchased two bags of...Paning's butong pakwan.

My spiritual son A. showed me the beginnings of an exquisite artwork that he is giving me. I can't wait to see the final product.

Calling it a day for painting. I have to wait for both glazes to dry completely.

Now Angelique and J. arrived. They had dinner out.

Everybody home.

Dinner alone. As it turns out, R. is allergic to shrimp, and so Aubrey and he decided to have food delivered. R. is editing a video and Aubrey is assembling a PowerPoint presentation for school.

Worked an hour on nineteenth glaze on one painting and eighth glaze on the other.

Aubrey and R. arrived from university 4:30 PM.

Went to the Korean store to buy a big, black pack of Sam Yang noodles 5:00 PM. Then went to Henry's to buy a new chair for my writing desk.

Our old chairs are temporarily being used to prop up my new paintings.

Decades ago, one of my Clinical Psychology professors was fond of alarming her students by pointing out their slurs, slips of the tongue, and behavioral quirks as possible indications of brain lesions.

I wonder where she is now. She seems to have disappeared into nowhere, like many full-time professors who retire and who are nothing else.

She must have finally fallen into the quicksand of her brain damage research.

Never perceive a brilliant and talented co-artist as a threat. You will only wallow in misery.

Embrace him, instead, as a treat.

Worked an hour on eighteenth glaze on one painting and seventh glaze on the other.

Home alone. Angelique off to college; Aubrey still at university.

Worked an hour on seventeenth glaze on one painting.

Brought my younger son Chito to the center. We had lunch there. I bought him a stainless steel thermos to use at work and sausages to take home to his family.

Worked an hour on sixteenth glaze on one painting.

Wearing the antique, bronze cross today. Its first message:

Counteract every piece of trash with a work of serious art. That, in itself, is a form of exorcism.

Good morning, Cubao!

The clouds are trucks laden with ripe sugar cane.

One of the blessings of retirement is finally being able to create your own space wherever you want it and whenever you want it, while also being able to devote yourself to your family.

Loving this antique, bronze cross that Regina gave me for my birthday. Its provenance is Imperial Russian circa late 18th - 19th century. Known as a "male cross" and an "Old Believers'" cross, it has King David's Psalm 68: 1-2 inscribed in Cyrillic on the back:

"Do something, God!

Scatter your hateful enemies.

Make them turn and run.

Scatter them like smoke!

When you come near, make them melt like wax in a fire."

It has been suggested that such a cross was used for exorcisms. I found the perfect chain for it, also bronze.

Aubrey and R. had dinner out. They are now home to study together.

Worked an hour on fifteenth glaze on one painting and sixth glaze on the other.

Dinner at home with Angelique.

Could hear the faint sounds of evening patrons and music at M.'s cafe from behind the wall. Another werewolves' night.

The werewolf crossed the street to buy a sugar-free grape and apple shake.

Read another chapter from The Cat Who Said Cheese, which might be my third painting charm, the first being the antique, Japanese still life and the second being the stone owl from Greece.

Worked an hour on fifth layer on the other painting.

This layer must dry completely before I apply its first glaze.

Worked an hour on fourteenth glaze on one painting.

Back from jalan-jalan. Paid our electric and desisted from shopping. Bought two dozen glazed doughnuts and four caramel coffee doughnuts instead.

The sun was baking bread on the streets. Glad to be wearing one of my caps and a light-colored shirt.

A teacher gives lessons, a trainer gives exercises, a coach gives prompts.

Lunch at home with Angelique.

Going jalan-jalan in a few.

CatCat and Ashraf are now off to Cavite.

Worked an hour on thirteenth glaze on one painting and fourth layer on the other.

Worked an hour on twelfth glaze on one painting and third layer on the other.

Good morning, Cubao!

The sun is a Faberge egg encrusted with topaz.

Everybody home.

Calling it a day for painting.

Worked an hour on eleventh glaze on one painting and second layer on the other.

Angelique, CatCat, and Ashraf have a chicken dinner at M.'s cafe.

Dinner at M.'s cafe with Aubrey.

Tried the buffalo wings with jalapeno; Aubrey and I like those too.

Afterward Angelique, CatCat, J., and Ashraf arrived completely exhausted from their trips to Pangasinan and Baguio City.

Will have to feed them at M.'s cafe also.

Worked an hour on tenth glaze on one painting.

Sat with Aubrey, who had a late lunch.

Worked an hour on ninth glaze on one painting.

It was Middle America that voted. All of the winners look like cast members of Carrie.

As to those who did not win, they simply belong to other, horror movies.

Brief cloudburst over Cubao.

Back from jalan-jalan.

Got exactly what I wanted, and am very pleased.

In the 1960s, when a person was hired on a contractual basis, his salary was actually BIGGER than the salary of a regular employee.

Going jalan-jalan to pay our phone bill--and perhaps buy something for my mah jong oracle set.

Feast of Saint Joseph the Worker in Barangay Kaunlaran. Last year a brass band did rounds for donations. This year an entire Zumba team is doing rounds for donations.

If people must sing for their supper, what happens when they can no longer sing?

We need to get rid of the door-to-door mentality.

The Filipino has a liberated spirit, but he is not an emancipated citizen.

At least, not yet.

https://mailchi.mp/singnet/live-laugh-and-love-with-theatreworks-this-20182019-season?e=a5730cc758

Worked an hour on eighth glaze on one painting.

Contractual labor, not poverty, is the form of slavery that will lead to revolution.

Every prankster ends up being an object of resentment.

Good morning, Cubao!

The sky is strung with green and yellow banners.

Calling it a day for painting.

Worked an hour on seventh glaze on one painting. Waiting for first layer on other painting to dry.

The April leaf falls off my planner.

Dinner in M.'s cafe with Aubrey and R.

So far I like the spicy, barbecued buffalo wings and the fried, dory fillet with tartar sauce.

The final objective of Labor should really be to get all employers to provide all their retirees a comfortable, monthly pension for the rest of their lives.

I am scandalized that many retirees I know of have to continue to scrounge for jobs.

Never accept group members who come to you with their personal ambitions.

It is when you try to control others that you are in for big disappointments.

Be an artist only because you enjoy doing what you do as an artist, and never to prove yourself to anyone.

Worked an hour on sixth glaze on one painting and construction lines and first layer on the other.

Worked an hour on fifth glaze on one painting.

First month into my Painting Year since my birthday in March, and I already have five, new, finished paintings.

Lunch alone.

Then worked an hour on fourth glaze on one painting and underpainting on another. Will commence construction lines on the latter piece once the underpainting is dry.

The sky is a canvas primed with titanium white.

Good noon, Cubao!

Home alone. Aubrey at university.

After this painting project I'll definitely watch the Grimm set and the Ghost Whisperer set that my sister Sylvia sent me from Sydney. Possibly in June.

Worked an hour on third glaze on one painting and thirteenth glaze on the other.

The painting with three glazes might have to take as much as 30 - 40 glazes in all.

The painting with thirteen glazes is finished. I am setting it aside and, since the first painting still has a long way to go, I will set up a new canvas beside it.

Dinner at M.'s cafe with Aubrey and R.

Aubrey and R. back from Gateway, and studying upstairs. They have school tomorrow.

Worked an hour on second glaze on one painting and twelfth glaze on the other.

Home alone.

Aubrey and R. went to Gateway.

Worked an hour on first glaze on one painting and eleventh glaze on the other.

Two more cups very black, Kalinga coffee that my son Chito bought in Baguio for me.

Lunch at home with Aubrey.

Waiting for fifteenth layer on one painting to dry before glazing.

Worked an hour on tenth glaze on the other painting.

Worked an hour on fifteenth layer on one painting and ninth glaze on the other.

Two more cups very black, Kalinga coffee that my son Chito bought in Baguio for me.

Good morning, Cubao!

The sun is a necklace of faceted topaz.

Angelique, CatCat, J., and Ashraf are upstairs--either already asleep or sitting up for their 4:00 AM pickup to go to a beach resort in the north and afterward to Baguio City. Aubrey has classes on Monday and so cannot join them.

Thought of painting another hour, but it's past 11:00 PM and I'd rather snuggle in bed to read another chapter from _The Cat Who Said Cheese_.

Yesterday and today were too eventful for a retiree and a hermit like me. I'm surprised that I was even able to sneak in regular hours of painting. Might do some later or just hang loose.

An option for me is have a vodka night in my captain's cabin bedroom.

Ashraf usually takes a long walk after dinner. There is nothing to see in Sitio Catacutan, however, unless one's third eye is open. I finally recommended that he and CatCat walk to the Arayat Market area, which should be interesting for Ashraf to see. I am sure our local markets look like the marketplaces in Egypt.

Pork-free dinner at home with Angelique, Aubrey, CatCat, J., and Ashraf. It was interesting to have six at table for a change.

Worked an hour on fourteenth layer on one painting and eighth glaze on the other.

Washed twenty-six brushes.

Ashraf gave me a black djellaba (I'd always wanted one) made in Syria (exotic provenance), two more decorative sheets of papyrus with decorative images (he produces them), and two bars of chocolate.

Worked an hour on thirteenth layer on one painting and seventh glaze on the other.

Your Messenger message:

"Sir do you sense that I have a bad karma in love? I was involved with a married man during my teenage years though I did not know that he was married when he was just courting me

"I haven't had a relationship in 10 years. Not sure why. Sadness usually engulfs me and I have this drowning feeling most of the time which pushes me to think of suicidal thoughts but my daughter draws me back to reality

"The thought of her suddenly becoming an orphan keeps me sane"


My reply:

Hello ___!

What I see is that you have a subconscious sense of self-sabotage due to a fear of having history repeat itself. As a result, you tend to be attracted to men who are not attracted to you--latent homosexuals among them--for two reasons: 1) You like challenging yourself to play men who are impossible to get, and 2) Your low self-esteem wants you to keep proving to yourself, again and again, that the perfect man does not exist.

I advise you to seek counsel from a wise woman or a mature, female psychologist. I have always been brutally frank, and I will be frank enough to say that this issue does not interest me at all. I don't like giving advice to men and women on the subjects of love, relationships, marriages, and separations. So, kindly refrain from bringing such problems to my table in the future.

Thank you, and I wish you the best of luck.

https://www.facebook.com/tHEATREwORKS.Sg/?hc_ref=ARQKlnpbykCfwWAoKisHHrZw6BDqYTkk6yhJlVhQp6hcI3qx0TishOgXvBciLGdVljg&fref=nf

Yes, I am conducting a playwriting workshop in Singapore July 2 - 10, 2018. The workshop is titled "From Dreams To Drama", and will incorporate dreamwork and dream analysis as writing exercises. Participants are required to sign up a month ahead, join a facebook group on the subject, open a dream journal, and send me entries via e-mail before I arrive in Singapore.

Two more cups very black, Kalinga coffee that my son Chito bought in Baguio for me.

Back from jalan-jalan. Paid our cable bill, bought two packs of noodles and a pack of joss sticks, and couldn't resist buying four big tubes of oil paint.

Bumped into Angelique, Aubrey, CatCat, and Ashraf in the supermarket. The family picked up Ashraf at the airport, had lunch out, and bought halal food.

Ashraf is staying with us overnight because the family is going to a beach resort tomorrow, and then they go on to Baguio City. We didn't want Ashraf to see Metro Manila only.

Two cups very black, Kalinga coffee that my son Chito bought in Baguio for me.

Jalan-jalan afternoon. Paying our cable bill and buying a pack of joss sticks.

August dropped by but the gallery was closed and we couldn't go there.

"Hi sir Tony

"I wanna ask po sna s interpretation ng pnaginip ko. Ngising ako knina s panaginip ko

"i wanna ask whats the meaning of my dream regarding of a baby...nanaginip ako ng baby ,Nanganak daw ang mother ko ng 2 na mgkasunod. Kinausap ko mother ko why nganak p cxa n matanda n cxa. At may hawak akong panty n lace sbi ko daw panty ng baby yun at sabi ng friend ko ngwwork sa dubai sulatan /pirmahan ko ang panty Tas yung panty isinasayaw ko s ere. Can u please help me what's the meaning of this dream?"


My reply:

Hello ______!

In the Freudian context, this is a wish-fulfillment dream. It is your mother who gives birth rather than you only because of the defense mechanism displacement; your Ego cannot accept the image of yourself as pregnant. Your subconscious wish, however, should not be taken as the reflection of a desire to have an actual baby. It is more appropriately the desire to produce creative works, see a big project through, or prove to the world that you have a proactive and constructive mind.

The lace panty is equivalent to a laurel of victory that you aim to flaunt and gain admirers by once your baby is delivered.

The two babies, to me, indicate that your mind is torn between two values. Success entails a change in lifestyle. Along with prospective success, you would like to retain the usual life you have been living.

Good morning, Cubao!

The sky is a whiteboard on which you record your dreams.

I observe that rising prices and being short of money are making people ornery.

Don't take medication for insomnia. Try just lying in bed in the dark with your eyes closed, clear your mind, and do nothing until sunrise. Even if you do not fall asleep your body and your brain will have sufficiently rested.

There is vile competition among the reporters.

Beneficence is the result of having plenty.

As such, everyone can be compassionate, but not everyone can be beneficent.

Broadcasters are still pronouncing "drugs" as "drags".

Now they are pronouncing "gun ban"as "gan ban".

Old dogs do not learn new tricks because of old habits.

The displaced will cry out in hunger and find themselves on the verge of despair.

Huge problems do not always require huge solutions.

It is all right to fail your fans, but it is not all right to fail yourself.

Superficial pleasures do more harm than good.

Tony Perez's Art of War: I never Block people. I want them to CONTINUE seeing how much I am progressing.

You can be happy anywhere you choose to be as long as you find the secret keys to unlocking the doors to that happiness.

Alone in my favorite corner in M.'s cafe, with spicy barbecued buffalo wings and a light beer. Memories. This is where I wrote my novel _Cubao Ilalim: Unang Aklat_ in longhand two years ago.